Moving

Moving forward using all my breath -
This is a great line from one of my favorite
80's song. It punctuates how I feel and
Deal with life as of late...

Moving forward using all my breath -
I find things difficult to cope with at best.
I want to be amazing and be amazed, but
Half the time I am just dazed and
Confused by the reality of my reality.

Moving forward using -
Using the time to remember
Painful memories that I wish
I could reconcile by just breathing.

Moving forward using -
All my energy to not curl up
Into a ball of sadness and fear
Where I disappear into effortlessness.

Moving forward -
I begin to see there is light at the end of
The proverbial, trite, cliche tunnel and
That I can be me without gimmicks.

Moving forward -
I move without regards to lying because
I lay about lying to myself that everything
Will be all right - it can't be.

Moving -
In my bed, writhing to the rhythm of the
Beating in my head... it chafes the forgotten
Memories that once laid dead.

Moving -
It is better than not moving at all.
I tell my feet to do something too, like,
Moving forward
Using
All my breath.